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Excluding the post before this it has been 1 week+ since I last blogged. The past few days I had been doing nth but whining to friends, procrastinating non-stop and lots of thinking which is getting me no where.

Each conclusion I made will be rebutted by another conclusion from another thought. I know I should stop all this and start taking actions or it will get me no where. But there is just a hurdle which i just can't overcome - communications.

Being outspoken is 1 trait which i can't master and I do agree to a great extent that i am not putting effort. I always got this fear for talking to people that I am not so used to that I would be classified under introvert.

Through out this entire 1 week+ I really had disturbed many many people that are close and many of their words fall on deaf ears. I'll be on my own now not going to disturb anyone anymore.

Yes you guys are important to me too that's why it got me even more so emotional than before when I had those thoughts which I should not had. You guys had impacted my life so much that you made my years in poly extraordinary it is really great knowing you all. But I had caused you guys so much prolems that I am sick of being this sickening me infront of you all. Frens are great but if I am to be a pain to them i rather not had any to start with.

I had no idea who is still reading this blog. But I do hope whoever that's close to me are still reading. I apologise for everyth and thank you all for everything. Words are cheap yes I do agree but other than that I duno what else I can do.

Perhaps the simple life back then is more suitable for me. I just pray for the best to come in the future. I hope I'll be able to make a decision soon and reach another turning point in life.